The Day I Lost My Strength and Regained A Power I Forgot I Had

When you think of the word strength, the most common definition comes to mind. Simply put, to be strong is to have power. I believe we all have a certain level of strength (or power) inside us propelling us through life. Some people may or may not agree with this.

Strength

Earlier this week, I was having a really bad day. I know days like this happen on occasion but it is the day I lost my strength. I was working on a holiday with less sleep, dealing with grumpy people, and felt physically and mentally tired. I had a choice: give in to negative, power-sucking thoughts or brace myself and start to think positive and move forward. Can you guess what I chose?

I lost my strength to fight through this rough day and felt powerless. My smile quickly turned into a smirk. My hopefully eyes had gone still. The encouraging spirit I carry with me was on the defense. I had become a defenseless and angry shell of a body. The thought of punching a wall, or someone in the face was on the forefront of my mind. I’m serious.

To my surprise, others started to notice my weakness. (I thought I was hiding it somehow.) I received encouraging words and hugs from people I once helped before. I was offered an arm to punch to throw this *funk* out of my system but I declined. And then someone shared how he had regained his strength. He accepted it and moved on. He exercised to mentally prove to himself he has power left in his body. He had told me, “The mind needed a reminder to tell the rest of your body, you are still in control of it.” Does that make any sense? It did for me.

Later that evening, I wanted to cry out my negative emotions and welcome in new ones. Unfortunately, it was beyond tears. I laced up my running shoes and walked outside to my garden. As I watered new life around me, I felt a smile form across my face. With running shoes on, I convinced myself I can tire myself out by running.

RLT - garden 2014

30 minutes later I was sweating, bursting with endorphins, and with a clearer thought: you are an unstoppable force. I wanted to run a mile without stopping, and I did it! I had ran one mile in 12:41 and walked/run my second mile in 15:44.

RunKeeper - RLT stats

I could have stayed home and stayed in my *funk*, or embrace it and fight back. By fighting back, I regained a source a strength to overcome what had taken over me.

If you LIKE my business page on Facebook, you will see a common thing happening on Fridays I call a “Friday Focus”. The topic varies by what you suggest or what comes to mind. My goal is to help YOU, the reader, to take away something valuable than you may not have considered before. If you want to contribute to an upcoming Friday Focus, please leave me a comment and we can make it happen.

Freedom To Choose, Freedom To Be

Source Credit:  Krista Campbell Photography

Freedom  |  Source Credit:  Krista Campbell Photography

The fourth of July represents our country’s Independence Day. We would not be the country we are today if it was not for the dedicated men and women in the armed forces, who have and continue to, fight for our freedom.

How can we model their heroic behavior in our own lives?

We may only be one person, but we all have the power to change the world around us. Our world is as big or as small as we make it.

Are you living the American dream? Do you have big plans for you life? What is stopping you from going after them?  Take today to reflect on the obstacles you have overcome in the past and what you want to achieve in the future.

We are all given the freedom to choose where we want to go in life. We are all given the freedom to be who we want to be. Now it is up to you how far you will go…

Everything is a Test of Faith

As I write this out, I glance at the top of my screen and see the clock. It’s going to be another late night, but how many times does I stay up late doing other unproductive things? Always. I promise you everything is a test of faith as I tell you a story.

I am not perfect. I don’t have three months of bills saved up in my savings account for a “rainy day.” I saved up enough money for a computer program instead of saving for my future. I’m 24 years young and sometimes I am naive. Should I be more proactive about saving? Yes. Am I worried about where the money is going to come from? No. I have put one of the hardest staples in my life up to God. Money. I don’t fear losing it or not having enough. I have been tested in the past to choose between buying myself lunch or giving money to a mother who was short money for a child’s birthday cake. Guess what? I felt compelled to give her half my money, but not all because I thought I needed half for lunch. No more than 15 minutes later, my boss tells me I have a check from a claim for a lost dividend from two years ago came in. I was given a check amount about three times as much as I could have given the mother! Coincidence? Hardly!  Through this experience and wisdom from God, I have learned I failed this test. I failed by putting my trust in my own hands instead of his.

Monday.

I was driving home from college to go to work when my car started to overheat. I pulled over and popped the trunk (to get the gallon of water I keep for reasons like this) and the hood. I could have been worried, but I felt calm. I got the water out and closed the trunk to check my radiator coolant level. It was moderate, so I added more water. I got back inside and waited for my car to cool down. Soon a Road Ranger pulled up beside me and I told the nice man what had happened. He was a sweet, older man who asked me to pop the hood so he could do what I had just done. He said there wasn’t much I could do but carefully drive it home and do what we had just done. I figured as much and carefully got back on the highway. I didn’t make it two miles and my car started to overheat again. I forced myself to go to the next exit to park in a public parking lot and call my parents. After about three hours of waiting to coordinate schedules, I was back home as my car stayed where in a public parking lot.

Was I upset? Sure. Was I worried. Honestly, not as much as I thought I would be. I realize this was a way the devil could keep me back from doing the things that make me who I am. I am not a missionary knocking on doors or traveling the world, but I am making a difference in my small world. When I am in my car, I am free to go where I am led to go. Without a car, I am stuck at home and at the mercy of fate. Fate knows I believe in something deeper, more meaningful so it can be pushed aside.

Tuesday.

I tried arranging a car situation to get a ride to where I needed to be today and guess what? It didn’t work out. Was I upset? It goes without saying I was, but there was nothing I could do. I didn’t fret or worry myself with the weight of fear or doubt. I told who I had to about the situation and left it in God’s hands. I worked from home and got assignments done. In the middle of working from home, I felt sick. I started to feel cold chills and my feet felt started to feel heavy. I must have eaten something awful because I was starting to feel really weak. If I was at the office of where I should have been today, I would have been uncomfortable. At least I was at home in pajamas enduring the nauseated experience. After eating something solid and medicine, I started to feel a bit better.

I ended up visiting my car with my mom to diagnose the damage. I was hopeful, but sadly my motor is shot. There was a rattle noise when we tried driving it around the parking lot. Obviously, driving it to next exit was dangerous to my car’s health, but smart because we were in the parking lot long after the sun had went down. On the way home, I was given options of what I can do with Betsy the Boat:  sell it to a junk yard, keep it for parts, sell it to someone looking for parts, and more. It was overwhelming, but my heart and mind were calm. Again. The rush of “it’s going to be ok” feelings filled me up with hope. Do I know where my next car is going to be? No. Am I going to have to work to produce a car fund? Yes. Does this scare me? Not really.

Wednesday morning.

I know when it comes to my faith, I am a warrior who has wisdom beyond her years. I have the gift to help others through prayer and words of encouragement. Sometimes those words are something so specific, it is much appreciative by the person I am helping that I had said something. Without my faith telling me to open my mouth and allow the spirit to speak through me, I would not have brought joy into people’s lives. Living by faith is not only following God’s word, acting in obedience, sharing his love but it’s a matter of trusting in God’s plan more than your own. All this is who I am and why the devil tries to attack me when life gets me down. Do you ever feel that way? It’s a downward spiral of doubt to more doubt until it’s a weight of an ugly slump. I know if I am down and shaken, I am not standing firm in God’s will. For the first time in years, I am certain the future is bright because I passed this test and know more will be coming behind it. Am I ready? More than I will ever be with God near my side.

Do you have a test of faith you passed or failed? Maybe we can learn something from one another.